Waiter Rant: Thanks for the Tip -- Confessions of a Cynical Waiter

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The remaining twenty percent, however, are socially maladjusted psychopaths. Waiter Rant offers the server's unique point of view, replete with tales of customer stupidity, arrogant misbehavior, and unseen bits of human grace transpiring in the most unlikely places.


  1. Waiter Rant: Thanks for the Tip--Confessions of a Cynical Waiter;
  2. Waiter Rant : Thanks for the Tip--Confessions of a Cynical Waiter, Libary Edition.
  3. Waiter Rant: Thanks for the Tip--Confessions of a Cynical Waiter.
  4. Waiter Rant - Wikipedia.

Through outrageous stories, The Waiter reveals the secrets to getting good service, proper tipping etiquette, and how to keep him from spitting in your food. The Waiter also shares his ongoing struggle, at age thirty-eight, to figure out if he can finally leave the first job at which he's truly thrived. Steve Dublanica is the bestselling author of Waiter Rant , which spent twelve weeks on the New York Times bestseller list. He lives in the New York metropolitan area with his joint-custody dog, Buster.

August Indie Next List. The rest of the book follows his adventures and misadventures with the surly kitchen staff, incompetent wait staff, and the snooty, entitled patrons who can make a waiter's life a living hell. I assumed based on the description and various blurbs that all of this would be funny. Except it's not. By one-third of the way through, it failed to elicit a chuckle, a twitter, a smirk, or even one of those weird laughs that consist of basically blowing air out of your nose really hard when something catches you kind of off-guard and you're not sure if it's appropriate to laugh.

And I like to think that I'm not humor impaired. I laugh and laugh often. The problem here is that being cynical is not the same as being funny. Now when funny and cynical come together with a dash of acerbic wit, it can be a beautiful and miraculous thing I'm looking at you, Anthony Bourdain , but there's no magic here and I'm reading it because--once again, I'm looking at you Anthony Bourdain.

The other reason it failed to entertain me is because its main message seems to be that people suck. And they do, I'll not argue against that. But waiters don't have the market cornered on I-don't-get-paid-enough-to-put-up-with-ungrateful-and-crazy-all-day-long. Anyone who has any job that requires contact with the public knows this spiel.

I've been a waiter, a cashier, a secretary, a teacher and the dynamic is always the same--as long as there's a customer, someone's going to be an asshole because you're there to serve them and, by God, that means doing precisely what they want when they want it and if not then they will be talking to your supervisor. Having lived this, reading about it is not how I want to spend my hours away from work.

Throughout, Dublanica comes across as some kind of super-waiter and, while I have no reason to doubt that he was good at his job and took it seriously, his stories fail to come to life as he seems incapable of portraying himself as flawed. He always seems to have the upper-hand and becomes the sage keeper of knowledge for the younger employees. It also makes the dining experience seem all about the waiter: what's best for the waiter, how to keep your waiter happy, tips that help make the waiter's job easier, etc.

Now, as previously mentioned, I've been a waitress briefly; as part of my training, I was seriously told to "kiss the babies and flirt with the old men"--homey don't play that game so apparently my "perkitude" wasn't up to their standards and I was unceremoniously fired. And, yes, people can treat waiters terribly and there are things one can and should do to make a dining experience pleasant for all involved.

Most of those things involve simple human decency. But Dublanica makes it sound like such a one-sided affair that waiters should be leaving tips to customers who jump through all the hoops outlined in the book to make it a pleasure to serve them. While some of the information about the dynamic that exists among the employees in a restaurant is mildly interesting, there's nothing really surprising here.

Cross posted at This Insignificant Cinder Shelves: non-fiction , books-about-restaurants , autobiographies. The buzz surrounding this book likens it as a front of the house version of Anthony Bourdain's Kitchen Confidential. While superfically, they both concern themselves with working in a restaurant, that is where the similarities end. While Bourdain uses his mystery-noir style writing to tell a gripping tale of working as a chef, "The Waiter" is a competant writer at best. Bourdain's work is scathing and the mesmerizing.

Waiter Rant: Thanks for the Tip--Confessions of a Cynical Waiter (Paperback)

This author is a waiter trying to be a writer. I know this book used to be a The buzz surrounding this book likens it as a front of the house version of Anthony Bourdain's Kitchen Confidential. I know this book used to be a blog, and all the while I was reading it I kept thinking, "why did I pay for this when it indeed feels like I'm reading a blog and not a novel?

I've worked in the front of the house of a restaurant before and the author does give away some trade secrets: like Open Table and how we use that computerized reservation system to comment on customers like if they have bad hygiene, how they dress, who wears too much make-up, etc and how every customers credit card information can be taken by a disgruntled employee and used since all numbers are stored on Open Table and anyone can view it.

Still, most of the time this book discusses issues that are impotent at best. No way!! Waiters are human and don't like being treated like second class citizens? People open up more when they're eating and waiters hear incredible things that should never be said in public? I'm almost fainting this is so incredible. Like I said, there isn't really much here that some common sense couldn't figure out.

Waiter Rant: Thanks for the Tip--Confessions of a Cynical Waiter - PDF Free Download

Waiter Rant might be interesting for someone who rarely eats out, but for any one who enjoys food and has been to at least 2 restaurants before, this book will bore you to tears. Medicore at best and redundant at worst. Shock I say. View 1 comment. Although this is ostensibly a collection of a waiter's experiences on the job, I hesitate to shelve it in non-fiction.

Dublanica so clearly takes artistic licenses that very little rings true. Not even half of the book actually concerns actually waiting tables. In every one of those stories, customers ar Although this is ostensibly a collection of a waiter's experiences on the job, I hesitate to shelve it in non-fiction. I've collected some of these stories in the "status updates" section, but here's one of my particular favorites: "'You make the best cosmopolitans.

She's about 50, her face shows the life she's led, but her eyes are warm and young. I was watching. You're more than just a waiter.

Aren't you? Customers can be very observant. Is that why this book has all the life and realism of a lump of dirt?

This book delivers very little insight into life "behind the scenes" of a restaurant, but a great deal of unwanted insight into Dublanica's narrow little mind. View all 3 comments.

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I honestly can't bring myself to finish this book. What a terrible, self-indulgent, boring, unfunny rant. I don't doubt he is - I j I honestly can't bring myself to finish this book. I don't doubt he is - I just wish he didn't feel he needed to persuade his readers as much. If you think the Puerto Ricans you worked with were awful, say that those specific Puerto Ricans were awful.

What's the big deal? God this book was boring. The rants centred mostly on interactions with his co-workers and employers and up to the point I stopped reading had barely even mentioned customers. I have never been so motivated to not finish a book. I usually feel bad about skipping out early; not this time. What a disappointment - I was super excited for this one. View all 6 comments. I had a couple of problems with this book The Waiter isn't a particularly good writer.

He could at times be a little condescending, which kind of pisses me off.


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  • So in regards to numero uno I don't think Waiter thinks he's writing epic literature here, so his less than stellar writing didn't ruin my life or anything. It read like a blog - I suppose because it is a blog - so really, just like with any blog, I was hoping just to get a few laughs and I had a couple of problems with this book It read like a blog - I suppose because it is a blog - so really, just like with any blog, I was hoping just to get a few laughs and an insider's peek in a world I don't know.